FRAGMENTS FOUND ON THE FOURTH DISC, EARTH, 2020

…on the roof, on the roof.
I knew he was coming. They were coming. There was no escape but to get on the roof. So now I’m on the roof. I’ve climbed through and out the window on the top floor of this, what is it? Ten? Twelve floor building? Feels like I’m in Iraq, feels like somewhere like that but I don’t really know. I don’t really know anything anymore. Feels like I’m awake but something is telling me: “You’re asleep, you’re asleep, wake up”. But then something else tells me this is for real. This is really happening. And then I get that feeling of dread deep down as I hear them coming up the stairs, their boots banging on every step.
Up here on the roof. Thought I would be able to see the mountains from up here but the sky is an opaque blur of grey. And on the edge of the roof, thank fuck, a rope! A rope! I throw it over the side. I can escape. I can get back down. Or at least to another building. Feelings of relief. But not really. I throw the rope over. And suddenly I’m on my way down. Down. Down. Please God let me get down…

…and so I wipe the window pane. It’s heavily smeared with grease. Some black grease. These windows have never been cleaned. And what makes it worse, outside is pitch black. I can’t see anything. My reflection, my stupid face coming back at me.
“Why don’t you turn off the lights,” she said, “then you can see better.”
So I turn off the lights.
Through the smeared black grease I see them. All four of them outside in the night. What are they doing? Waiting? Standing in an orderly row, I think its that that’s the creepiest thing. Like they’re waiting for a fucking bus or something. But they’re naked. And their skin is the color of … and the texture of plastic. And they are shivering. The second one turns and looks at me.
“Bless me lord for…”

MUSEUM OF ZITH, TETHAGATA VI